Killers (directed by Robert Luketic) is not an Ashton Kutcher movie. Don’t take it personal girls but Katherine Heigl outshines Twitterati Kutcher in this romantic action-comedy. Mr. Demi Moore has his moments but Heigl made me giggle like a beagle (maka-rhyme lang, haha) with her awkward, clueless wife-of-an-ex-spy role.

Make no mistake, though, Killers is an underwhelming comedy which could have solidly nailed a positive message but got frustrated by ineffective and unnecessary humor.

Spencer Aimes (Kutcher) is a spy who quit CIA when he married Jen Kornfeldt (Heigl). But we know (at least from Hollywood) that CIA spies can’t just resign that easily. Three years later the Agency goes after Spencer with a 20 million dollar bounty on his head, unleashing a neighborhood of assassins to hound him. To her shock, Jen is caught with her husband in a fight for their lives and marriage.

Speaking of shock, I am shocked that Hollywood still produces films (or maybe at least this one) that present marriage as something that’s important and worth-saving. The film also expounds on the importance of trust, honesty and transparency between married lovers.

Spencer and Jen met in Nice, France.
 What a lovely place. Sana makapunta din ako dun  

Spencer never revealed his past to Jen in order to protect her. But when his skeletons start breaking free from his closet, Jen’s life has never been in such jeopardy. Spencer also shows deep respect to Jen’s parents even if they aren’t very likeable.

Jen and Mrs. Kornfeldt, who is NOT having tea here.

Despite these positive messages however, the film is ruined by profane language and Mrs. Kornfeldt’s (Catherine O’Hara) alcoholism which is played throughout the story as a running gag. The movie’s violence is also too gruesomely depicted for its comedy genre. In one scene, for instance, an assassin is killed by getting impaled by a creepy chandelier creepily made of creepy antlers. For Bambi’s sake, it could’ve been someway else!

The movie ends with Spencer and Jen finally overcoming their adversaries, plus the arrival of their bundle of joy. It seems a happy, “settling down” ending but peace of mind remains aloof to Spencer as he activates security devices to protect his baby. It reminds me of Proverbs 1 which wisely warns, “My child, if sinners try to entice you, do not consent! If they say, ‘Come with us! We will lie in wait to shed blood… Join with us! We will all share equally in what we steal…’ But these men lie in wait for their own blood, they ambush their own lives! Such are the ways of all who gain profit unjustly; it takes away the life of those who obtain it!”

Jade

Jade is naturally horrified by Mathematics in the same degree that activities which require stamina, agility and athleticism ruins his day. But far from being a couch potato, he bought a brand new Ab Rocket (for an amazingly discounted price) which he plans to use while watching TV and DVDs—activities with which, for him, either society’s moral ascent or descent can be pretty much discerned. He co-hosts a web-radio show on The Edge, and recently went back to school studying Film.

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